pretty flower ugly roots

Hey everyone!

a lot of people have been asking me about university and a levels where im gonna go what im gonna do.......



honestly, i believe that at this tender age of 19.. i do not know what i want to do with my life yet. i believe that all my choices and beliefs about career and the future are a result of influence and pressure from my parents. Initially.. i wanted to study banking and finance, go into trading or something like that- because my parents told me to. I mean, at the end of the day they always know best right?


but then came the crash when i got my results.....(please don't even remind me about it lol) i felt so angry at everything. i tried to blame something for my results. i tried to blame myself but i couldnt. i know i tried my best and i was so upset at everyone for not being able to empathize

obviously with that kind of shit grades i can forget about finance and banking in singapore la. so i applied for uni of exeter in UK. which i got an offer for finance and accounting. but obviously i applied for local unis as well. so i received an offer from NTU early may and i was pretty bummed...because they offered me environmental engineering with business minor. On that note i already felt even more compelled to study in the UK LOL. then i was walking on the street complaining to jon that i got accepted into that course when i receive a message from NUS. So i checked my NUS application and was praying SO HARD i get into FASS or something but BOOM. "congratulations. you have been offered a place in environmental engineering" i was like WTF MAN. ME???? AN ENGINEER?!?!?!? WHAT THE HELL LOL SO NOT ME

i was really already about to reject the shit out of both schools but then this ray of hope appeared LOL i found a friend going into the same course AND I WAS SO HAPPY. i was thinking like what kinda aliens are gonna be in this weirdo course?!?!?!?! but then i started thinking really hard about what i wanted to do with my life. whether i really really wanna do anything in the future... but.. i didn't have an answer at all. i don't know what i want to do in the future.

this quote struck me really hard: "if you do not know what you want to do, then it does not matter where you go"

so i decided to stick with NUS. well its now the 8th uni in the world right??? HAHA. things will work out eventually and when i finally figure out what i want to do with my life, i'll start acting on it. for now, i'll take things as they come.

but of course i checked the career prospects for environmental engineering and they seemed quite promising la. like we'll do newater and shit. and like work in the petroleum industry...

i hope everything will work out fine. :-)
see ya'll in NUS!